
Many moons ago (hmmm... feels kind of fun to start a post like that), years before I was married, I remember pondering aloud to a friend. I was asking them if they thought I would EVER get married. And he said, 'Yes, I think so. The Lord will give you someone to love.'
I was actually quite taken aback by that (which is kind of frightening to admit.) At the time I wasn't really looking for someone to love - I was looking for someone
to love me.
Of course that's a natural desire and a good one - we all crave love. Honestly though, it was rather immature and a tad bit unhealthy. I'm still plenty immature but hopefully getting better everyday!!! The unhealthy part came from a longing to be satisfied in earthly love before being satisfied in the Lord. I don't think I was aware of it at that time, but I'm telling you how it was... and how I still have a tendency to swing that way.
In my life I have drank (drunk?) from the horrid cess pool of lies called many romantic movies. (Before you desire to lynch me I'm not saying they're all bad... but ask yourself the next time you watch one - did this movie make me want to lay down my life for someone? or did it make me feel like I'm not getting what I deserve?) Most romantic movies today center around someone searching and finding their 'soul mate' and thus all their problems and inner turmoil are resolved. Unless you're soulmate is Jesus, I'm afraid that equation is just not going to work.
Choose wisely when you marry. Choose someone you enjoy, choose someone who provokes you, choose someone you're attracted to, choose someone who confronts you, choose someone you respect, choose someone who loves Jesus. But be aware that you will never be satisfied
in that person. Be aware that if somehow your enjoyment lessens, they no longer provoke you, and you find yourself no longer attracted to them - that you STILL have someone to love. If you have chosen marriage, you've chosen covenant and the gift of love is still yours to give.
I feel so blessed to have someone to love, with all of his wonderful qualities and all of his flaws - in the highs and in the lows. I am honored that he chose me to be his wife and so thankful that daily (hopefully) I'm learning how to love.